tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18587109593951284592024-01-02T23:06:40.866-08:00The Literary HousewifeA blog about books and housewifery. But mostly books!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-70570591064302707602012-05-21T12:04:00.000-07:002012-05-21T14:38:11.473-07:00In Which My Computer Dies, I Don't Join The Army, and I Touch Jared Leto<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Hi. It's me. We have some things to catch up on. Firstly, my computer died and cut me off from the outside world for many months. But then my ex-stepmom (more real than a fairy godmother, twice as surreal, and definitely awesome) came back into my life after 17 years and spoiled me rotten with many gifts, including a new laptop. On September 29h, 2011 I got to live out a fantasy in which I got to touch Jared Leto- AND his brother, Shannon. Granted, it wasn't EXACTLY like all my fantasies (I'll spare you the details of THOSE little gems) but it was exciting and awesome nonetheless. I was a pretty big fan of 30 Seconds To Mars before I went to the concert, now I'm beyond obsessed. Except I'm too lazy (and too busy wildly flailing like a madwoman in my attempt to be a good mommy) to stalk any of the band members. But after meeting them each in person and REALLY listening to their music I have finally decided which one is my favorite. All of them. And their staff. And, for that matter, the fans (Echelon). Yep, I'm pretty much a hopeless case at this point. I paid $9 to watch a live show (four hours of old songs, new songs, palm trees, and Jared setting things on fire) and then promptly pre-ordered a rubber chicken. But enough about me, let's talk about... me. So there I was, all ready to run away and join the Army. I passed all the tests, jumped through some metaphorical flaming hoops, and was all ready to go. But I kept having this nagging thought. "What about my girls?" I would think to myself obsessively, often not sleeping at night and falling into a depression. "What about the missed birthdays? The missed milestones? What's gonna happen when I'm gone all the time? Will Anja forget me? Will Alexandra resent me? Will my husband remember the sunblock and the diaper bag and the favorite toys/blanket/colors/flavors? And then Alexandra started having nightmares. Waking up crying, talking about how I was gone forever and never coming back. She got clingy, sad, sullen. As a person interested in having a good career in spite of having no education and few skills, joining the Army seemed like a no-brainer because the the benefits and training are awesome. But as a mother, I realized I couldn't do it. Sometimes I still kick myself in the ass for not joining. I missed out on an amazing opportunity. But as a mom, I feel like I made the right choice for my particular situation. I would have been a great soldier, but my kids need me more than the Army does. The other day I told Alexandra, "I'm glad I didn't go to the Army. I like being here with you." She grabbed my hand and told me "I'm glad you didn't go to the Army too, because you would of got dead and I would never see you again and I would be sad forever." "Who said that would happen, sweetie?" Lots of people go into the Army and don't get dead!" "Nobody told me, mommy. I just knowed it." And since I believe that kids have a way of knowing things, I believe her. It also explains how the nightmares instantly stopped when I decided I wasn't going. But now I have to pick up the pieces of my shattered plans and attempt to build some other future. I really don't know what to do with myself, but I'll figure it out- one stumble at a time. <br />
<br />
Anyway, books. Books are awesome. I need to get a Kindle. It's on my to-do list. I'll get back to you about books after I read one. I read the <u>Hunger Games</u> trilogy, so if you haven't read those yet, crawl out from under your rock and get those books. NOW! Do it! </div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-56458836874058464382011-09-21T14:33:00.000-07:002011-10-03T13:22:36.561-07:00Miss Peregrine's Home For Unusual Children<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I liked this book. I liked the concept, I LOVED the way the way the pictures tied the story together, I liked most of the characters, and the story had some really good points to it. I liked it enough that I would read another book in this series, should one be written. That being said, I finished it feeling like there was something lacking. I'm not sure if it was that the suspense wasn't built quite enough in the parts that needed it, or it's because the ending was too abrupt, or because so much of the story's potential was left unexplored. This book has all it takes to be something great, but about halfway through I started to feel underwhelmed. So much so, that I'm thinking about reading it again just to make sure I got it. I feel kind of like I missed something. So, I'll give you the really quick and dirty version of what happened:<br />
<br />
Loner kid loved his grandfather in spite of grandfather's strained relationship with loner kid's father due to grandfather's general craziness<br />
<br />
Family drama is implied<br />
<br />
Grandfather dies<br />
<br />
Grieving<br />
<br />
Loner kid wants closure and to find out what grandfather was wildly ranting about and to figure out weird clues left by grandfather<br />
<br />
Loner kid and father travel to Wales for bonding, bird watching, and so loner kid can find a place his grandfather talked about<br />
<br />
Loner kid finds Miss Peregrine and her unusual children, finds out truth about grandfather and his craziness<br />
<br />
Things get violently killed, monsters that most people can't see are on the loose, space/time continuum has a loop, weirdness that can only be explained by reading the book happens, loner kid finally fits in somewhere<br />
<br />
Loner kid has to decide between staying with his family and being unhappy or running away and saving the world<br />
<br />
Monsters! Eek!<br />
<br />
Loner kid (now no longer a loner) decided to run away with unusual children to try to save the world.<br />
<br />
Giant gaping opening for subsequent books<br />
<br />
The end<br />
<br />
It's a good story, but not greatly written- but since 1) it's better than anything I've written and 2) it's this guys first book, I'm more than willing to read more when it becomes available. There's a lot of really good concepts in this novel, and the more I think about it, the more I think I'm going to read it again sometime. It bothers me that I can't quite pinpoint my dissatisfaction, and I'm willing to admit it could have been due to my own mindset at the time. But first, I need to get back to the H.P. Lovecraft I've been reading.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.blogger.com/%E2%80%9Dhttp://tv.mtvema.com/artists/thirty-seconds-to-mars%E2%80%9D" mce_href="”http://tv.mtvema.com/artists/thirty-seconds-to-mars”"><img border="”0″" mce_src="”http://thirtysecondstomars.thisisthehive.net/EMAs/ema-vote-200×150.gif”" src="”http://thirtysecondstomars.thisisthehive.net/EMAs/ema-vote-200×150.gif”" /></a><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-13649040340945201282011-08-26T10:03:00.000-07:002011-08-26T10:03:15.674-07:00My Army date got pushed back and other adventures<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Well, my Army date got pushed back a couple of months because of an orthodontic device I need to get removed. Specifically, a screw in the roof of my mouth. Or, as I like to say, "My orthodontist screwed me in the mouth and now I can't join the Army."<br />
<br />
The screw gets removed next month, and then I'll get to go to basic training in November. A minor setback. I should have posted this episode of blogginess sooner, but I've been really busy wasting time on Facebook.<br />
<br />
Since my Army date got moved, I sold my car to cover the cost of child care so we can keep the girls enrolled so they don't lose their spots. As such, I've been trying to make myself be more active because 1) I totally need to work on that anyway because I'm joining the Army and 2) I should probably step foot outside of the house once in awhile.<br />
<br />
Aside from paying for some child care, selling my car also gave me money to get the screw removed, new tires for the spousal unit's car (it SERIOUSLY needed them!), running shoes with toe pockets (sorry for not following your advice Lauren... but it's like shoes that are TOE SOCKS! *squee!*), and...... I GOT A GOLDEN TICKET TO SEE 30 SECONDS TO MARS!!!!! (Jared Leto- om nom nom nom) So, after my Army date unexpectedly got moved, my favorite band coincidentally added a Honolulu tour date, my car that had been up for sale on craigslist for about a month was coincidentally found by a woman who "totally LOVES" that make and model (which is weird... it was a Ford Taurus stationwagon.) so I coincidentally had money available to buy tickets to MEET my favorite band on the month I'll be turning turn 30! That's what a Golden Ticket is- I get to meet the band, watch the concert from the side of the stage, get some limited-edition swag, and I get to be onstage for one of their songs. I'm so excited I can't contain myself! I'm 30 going on 13!<br />
<br />
In book-related news, I did read a book and I liked it, but I'm not going to review it yet. My brain's not in book review mode and I have to get ready to spend the day with my friend Racheal. She's a glass sandblasting artist and she's going to teach me how it's done. I'm so excited to get to learn how to do a new thing! </div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-3000746338058297362011-07-07T16:21:00.000-07:002011-07-07T16:21:54.540-07:00Two Nice Reads With Reviews That Don't Do Them Justice Because I'm Losing My MarblesOk, so I've pretty much been slacking on my reading. I've been reading very little, and (obviously) blogging even less.<br />
<br />
The first one up is <u>Lunar Light</u> by Penelope Fletcher. Lunar Light is a nice, erotic, warm and fuzzy love story- except that by '"warm and fuzzy" I mean the protagonists have a habit of turning into giant hairy beasts that eat human flesh. And they prefer to be cold, not warm.<br />
<br />
There's a lot of fictional beasts that consume humans out there these days, and I was skeptical about reading ANOTHER love story about some werewolf/vampire/zombie junk. Well, I can promise you that there is nary a zombie, vampire, or werewolf (per se) to be had! And nobody falls in love with their dinner! I was pleasantly surprised! These are violent, people-eating beasts that actually VIOLENTLY EAT PEOPLE.<br />
<br />
Don't get me wrong, I read (and enjoyed reading) all of the Twilight schlock, but the more I thought about it, the more the inner cynic in me pictured it as being about as likely as me having an all-consuming love for a freshly-baked cookie, stalking it while it slept, endangering my life for it, and then refusing to eat it. Yeah. Not likely.<br />
<br />
Like sex and violence? Like vicious werebeasts? Then give this book a read. I read it quickly (almost like devouring a freshly-baked cookie) and people who are grammar Nazis or overly picky might find tiny details they don't approve of (I can't think of specific examples, but remember seeing a couple of little things as I read) but they can just stuff it. It was a fun, quick read and I liked it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Next up is <u>Immortalis</u> by R.S. Emeline. This story revolves around a variety of people who have a genetic predisposition to immortality, and their need to 1) continue producing immortal offspring 2) protect their immortal offspring and 3) remain undetected by society at large.<br />
<br />
This is a story directed at young adults, but written in a way that it can be easily enjoyed by regular adults or immature adults such as myself. There's mystery, mayhem, and magic, gods and goddesses of varying religions, and truly unique characters.<br />
<br />
This is the first on a series of four books, and I am really looking forward to reading the others. The bad news is that I don't think it's been published yet- I got my grubby hands on a copy because I know the author (and she is amazing)... <a href="http://www.rsemeline.blogspot.com/">and you can find her here!</a><br />
<br />
<br />
...and now to the part where I'm losing my marbles. I signed up for the Army, and I leave for basic training in just over 3 weeks. I'm on the verge of freaking out. I'm going in to learn a foreign language (I know none, unless 'sarcasm' counts) and I'm hoping to get a bachelor's degree while I'm enlisted. I KNOW, with all my heart, that this is the best thing I can do for my family and myself. But I've never had to be away from my kids, so I'm freaking out about leaving them. And I have a TON of things I need to get done, and none of it is doing itself (of course). And, mostly I'm just freaking out about being away from my kids. I want to eat an entire cheesecake, drink a bottle of tequila, and hide in a closet (or similar dark, quiet space) for the next three weeks. Turns out, that isn't an option. I'll try to do at least one more post before I leave, but if you don't hear from me check in the closet, pantry, or other dark, quiet space... and send tequila. Thanks.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-43197185060947706962011-04-06T11:04:00.000-07:002011-08-26T10:04:47.464-07:00Metropolis by Brian and Melanie Jackson<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">First, I need to apologize for dragging my feet on posting... again. Things have been interesting- I had house guests from out of state and I enlisted in the Army. I leave for basic training in August. I'm going in to learn signals intelligence and linguistics, which means I get to learn a foreign language- I'm so excited! And nervous! And excited! I'm going to have to be away from my kids for long periods of time, and my heart is already breaking over that. Being away from them will definitely be the most difficult part of this whole adventure. But I'm doing this for them- to help stabilize our family's finances, to be able to send them to college, to give me a chance to learn some things about myself so I can be a better mom. They are my world, and I will sacrifice anything to do the things I feel will be best for them in the long run. For me, they are the reason the sun rises each day, and the fate of my world rests on their well-being. But enough about me.<br />
<br />
<u>Metropolis</u> is, quite simply, a great book. In between this and <u>The Demon Girl</u> I have officially become addicted to indie literature. Indie lit has fewer calories than Ben & Jerry's, and is twice as satisfying! There are some AMAZING stories out there, just waiting to be read! I get giddy just thinking about it. Oh, right- back to the book. Let's try this again.<br />
<br />
Long story short: <u>Metropolis</u> is the first book in the <i>Book of Dreams</i> series. It has everything I like in a book- gripping story line, relatable characters, wonderful descriptions that make the world visible inside your mind... It's just awesome. It's a perfect balance of dark, weird, and wonderful- and it has a strong female lead, to boot! Let's enter the Narcoscape, shall we?<br />
<br />
Nicodemus (Nic) Smith is a dream retrieval expert. She can traverse the entire world of dreams (the Narcoscape) with the greatest of ease (well, sort of) and bring people who are stuck there back to their bodies- such as people who are comatose. Needless to say, her job is quite specialized and people who don't understand it aren't always receptive to the idea. But she's mostly ok with that. Dream retrieval is a job her family has done for generations, and she's the last one available to still do the job. Her parents and husband are dead, and she has no children. Her Aunt Gertrude is all she has left, and she's in a care home due to her ever-deteriorating mental capacities.<br />
<br />
One day, a mysterious stranger shows up to her office and asks for her help. Everyone knows that mysterious strangers are usually nothing but trouble- and this one is no exception. He's a Freudian- a member of a powerful, elite group of psychologists who don't believe in Nic's work. So why is a Freudian risking being blackballed from his organization (or worse) to come visit Nic? Because something from the Narcoscape (which, until very recently he didn't believe in) had come across and driven his dear friend to madness, and is now after him. And his (now deceased) friend believed this entity is responsible for a number of unexplained suicides. Naturally, she thinks this sounds ridiculous. Sure, the Narcoscape is a whole other world full of infinite possibilities- but it's all just dreams. Dreams can't come wakeside, right? Right? Yeah... about that.<br />
<br />
In this book, you will find the following: Horrifying monsters of various description, San Francisco, intriguing detectives, evil mayors, a car chase, gun-wielding psychopaths, cowboys, red grass, a hole to another dimension, an amazing sports arena, an awesome batty old lady, hot cocoa, parts of ancient Egypt, and many, many other things of note.<br />
<br />
Read it. Right now. Stop what you are doing, and pick up a copy of this story. DO IT!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe align="left" frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="http://rcm.amazon.com/e/cm?t=thelit03-20&o=1&p=8&l=bpl&asins=B0045JK2YQ&fc1=000000&IS2=1&lt1=_blank&m=amazon&lc1=0000FF&bc1=000000&bg1=FFFFFF&f=ifr" style="align: left; height: 245px; padding-right: 10px; padding-top: 5px; width: 131px;"></iframe></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-77683392486909852002011-03-11T10:22:00.000-08:002011-03-11T10:22:25.914-08:00Japan<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Dear Japan,<br />
<br />
I don't know you, but I've always been a big fan of yours. I am as deeply pained by your suffering as an outsider can be. This whole scenario is unfathomable to me. I didn't know that earthquakes could get so big! I am at a total loss of words over this event.<br />
<br />
I wish to express compassion and empathy, but words fail me. I am silenced both by the tragedy of this event, and by the awe that the damage wasn't worse. If a quake like that struck Hawaii, where I live, I'm pretty sure we'd be almost completely wiped out.<br />
<br />
I wish I could wrap my head around this so I could be more proactive in what I can do to help. I'm just stunned. Every time I think about the damage, the loss of life, I feel like I got punched in the stomach.<br />
<br />
I may not know you, but I know people over there. People I used to work with. I hope they're ok. I hope you're all ok. I want to hug you all, make you some soup, wrap you in blankets, and tell you that we're going to get through this.<br />
<br />
Stay strong, Japan. I don't know you, but I love you. Get better soon. I will be looking for ways to help. You are a strong, innovative country filled with resilient people. My thoughts and prayers are with you, and may all of those who didn't make it through this tragic event rest in peace.<br />
<br />
Love,<br />
<br />
Jess</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-63281303768464574762011-03-09T10:07:00.000-08:002011-03-09T13:50:24.901-08:00Alice's Adventures In Wonderland<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">This is my second attempt at writing this installment- the first time, my wonderful children were both climbing on me and my youngest pushed some magical sequence of buttons that caused my entire post to vanish, and I was unable to retrieve it. I could have gotten mad, but instead I took it as a sign that it wasn't one of my better posts and I should try again. So here I am, a few days later, trying to do this wonderful story the justice it deserves. I know I will fail, too. I've accepted that. Not because of my mediocre blogging skills, but because this is one of my most favorite stories of all time. This and its sister story, <u>Through The Looking Glass</u>. But that one will get its own post. Oftentimes, the two are combined when a film is made, and unless you take the time to read them both, it's easy to get things mixed up. Both are wonderfully weird and fantastic.<br />
<br />
Charles Lutwidge Dodgson (aka Lewis Carrol) was a literary pioneer and genius. He boldly went forward into the realm of literary nonsense, and forever carved his own place in pop culture by opening up the world he found there and giving us all access to it. I love nonsense. I love it the way I love fine chocolate and the smell of my best friend's childhood home, and the smell of books; the way Hippies love patchouli oil. I love the way it feels to stretch my brain and my imagination in new ways, and the kind of pure, innocent humor that comes with the sublimely weird. I love it because it's funny without being harmful or critical, and because it makes my over-analytical brain take a break for a change. It lets me escape from my daily life for a bit, and come back renewed and full of new perspective.<br />
<br />
Many of you are surely familiar with the basic storyline- Alice is getting a history lesson outside on a lovely day. She is bored, and easily distracted. Suddenly, she sees a rabbit run by, clothed, holding a pocketwatch. She chases it, follows it to a rabbit hole, and falls down. The fall is impossibly long, and it seems nearly an eternity before she lands. When she does land, she finds herself in a strange room with a little door with a beautiful garden on the other side and a bottle of strange liquid labelled 'Drink Me' on a table. After deciding that drinking mystery fluid from random bottles seemed like a good idea (as a child, this fascinated me, as a parent I find it horrifying!) she shrinks down to a little size, small enough to fit through the door. Except the door is locked. And the key is on the table that is now huge to her. She gets frustrated, but notices a cake that has 'Eat Me' written on it. Naturally, she decides that eating random baked goods of mysterious origin is a good idea, so she eats it and becomes ginormous. So large, in fact, that her head hits the ceiling and she sees no hope of becoming small enough to go through the door. So she cries. And cries. And, being giant, floods the place. She grabs a fan which makes her shrink again, very small. She, along with many other creatures, get swept away in the flood of tears. And things get weirder from there.<br />
<br />
In this book, Alice encounters many unusual characters, including my favorite literary character of all time, the Cheshire Cat. She also meets the Mad Hatter, March Hare, Duchess, Mock Turtle, Caterpillar, and the Red Queen and Red King.<br />
<br />
General weirdness ensues and by the end of the story Alice is quite fed up with it all. The Red Queen shouts "off with her head!" But Alice, unafraid, calls out the queen's minions as being nothing more than a pack of cards as they swarm her. Alice then wakes up to find that it is leaves falling on her, not cards swarming her, and her sister is trying to wake her up so they can go home.<br />
<br />
This is a fun read for when life gets too serious. It lets you escape to a place so weird, that your own problems no longer matter- and when it becomes time to face them again you can do it with gusto, and take heart knowing that there's a way through it somehow because everything is exactly as it is meant to be. After all, if it was meant to be different, it would be, right?<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe align="left" frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="http://rcm.amazon.com/e/cm?t=thelit03-20&o=1&p=8&l=bpl&asins=1616402237&fc1=000000&IS2=1&lt1=_blank&m=amazon&lc1=0000FF&bc1=000000&bg1=FFFFFF&f=ifr" style="align: left; height: 245px; padding-right: 10px; padding-top: 5px; width: 131px;"></iframe></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-36836328988276137252011-01-30T13:36:00.000-08:002011-01-30T13:36:34.887-08:00The Time Machine<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Today I'm reviewing <u>The Time Machine</u> by H.G. Wells. This is a truly great piece of classic Science Fiction. The story revolves around a group of people listening to the narrative of a man who claims to have invented and used a machine that allowed him to go into the distant future and view the fate of mankind.<br />
<br />
Long story short: The Time Traveler uses his machine to go into the much distant future, and when her gets there he sees an evolved form of mankind called the Eloi, who are peaceful, simple, and seems to be free of social class or suffering. He observes their behavior and goes out to explore the nearby area. When he returns to the place he left his time machine, he discovers that it is gone.<br />
<br />
He begins to panic and searches frantically, only to figure out that it has been placed inside the pedestal of a nearby statue. He examines the pedestal, but can find no way to pry it open, and he ends up spending the night there. He notices the Eloi become agitated at night, and he catches glimpses of white, apelike creatures which the Eloi call Morlocks.<br />
<br />
Being as the Time Traveler and Eloi don't speak the same language, he can't figure out what the Morlocks are or why the Eloi are terrified of them- he only knows that they are very pale, very agile, and only come out at night. He grows curious about them, and tries to find one to get a better look. He manages to follow one, only to see it climb down a tube that lead underground, which leads him to believe that the Morlocks took his machine.<br />
<br />
One day, the Time Traveler saves an Eloi woman, Weena, from drowning. After she is saved, she follows the Time Traveler around, placing flowers on him and showering him with affection. He tries to get her to explain the Morlocks to him, but she grows agitated at their mention and he learns nothing. He decides to climb down one of the well-like tubes that lead underground to find the Morlocks, find his machine, and get back to his own time.<br />
<br />
Once underground, he finds a sophisticated network of tunnels and machinery. He finds some Morlocks while they are eating a meal of meat. This strikes him as unusual, since there are no cattle and the Eloi eat fruit. That's when he realizes that there are no old Eloi. No sick Eloi, either. The Eloi ARE the cattle! Realizing his danger, he barely escapes the Morlocks without becoming their next meal.<br />
<br />
During his escape, he finds that matches are a useful tools against the Morlocks because they are adapted to the dark and the bright light of fire blinds them. He also realizes that he's been wasting his matches, and has very few left. He decides to journey to a large ruin in the distance in the hopes that it will have some means to make fire so he can find a way to get the Morlocks to give him back his machine and hopefully find a way to help protect the Eloi.<br />
<br />
The Time Traveler and Weena make it to the ruin, which, as it turns out, used to be a museum. He finds some useful items against the Morlocks, and starts to head back. The Morlocks pursue him and Weena, There's some struggling, and an accidental forest fire which kills off a number of Morlocks and Weena.<br />
<br />
When the Time Traveler makes it back to the statue, the pedestal is open and his machine is visible. He climbs in, and the Morlocks close those door, thinking they have him trapped- but the Time Traveler hops on his machine, fires it up, and gets out of there in a hurry.<br />
<br />
He goes further into the future, sees a mostly dead world with a giant red sun, really thin air, and some large aggressive crabs. Then he decides its time to go home. He goes back to his time, tells his story, and most people don't believe him.<br />
<br />
This story touches on a lot of social issues not highlighted in this review. It is a story which makes you think, and that is my favorite kind. It is also a story which has managed to stay relevant over a hundred years after it was written, and even though it is a bit short you still get a deep feel for the characters. I recommend this story to anyone who wants to broaden the way they think of the fate of our species- and I think it should be required reading for anyone who claims to enjoy science fiction. <iframe align="left" frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="http://rcm.amazon.com/e/cm?t=thelit03-20&o=1&p=8&l=bpl&asins=0451528557&fc1=000000&IS2=1&lt1=_blank&m=amazon&lc1=0000FF&bc1=000000&bg1=FFFFFF&f=ifr" style="align: left; height: 245px; padding-right: 10px; padding-top: 5px; width: 131px;"></iframe></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-49947256693473473872011-01-14T10:27:00.000-08:002011-01-14T10:51:36.320-08:00Life, strife, and sufferingAre you comfy? You cozy? You snuggled up next to your computer with a warm cup of coffee like I am? Good. We're lucky. Not only are we just lucky- we're AMAZINGLY lucky. I believe, with all of my heart, that if we, as a species unite to help each other we are unstoppable. I've decided that I'm going to occasionally list causes that I'm supporting along with information and links to be able to donate. I can't make you care, and I can't make you donate- but I can't enjoy my cheap coffee with a clear conscience if I don't at least try.<br />
<br />
It's hard for me to just think of just one cause to start with because there are so many wonderful ways we can all contribute to each other's well being, so I'm going to start with the last cause I donated to- Habitat For Humanity, specifically, the chapter of Habitat for Humanity that is supported by The Echelon (read: awesome huge fan base/family) of the band 30 Seconds To Mars.<br />
<br />
I'm an Echelon member myself. Partly because their music is awesome, partly because of Jared Leto's extreme sexiness, and partly because of all the causes the band and their fans support. The Echelon House (HFH's 30STM group) is responsible for the building of 24 houses all over the world- that's 24 houses built by the fans of one band. Can you imagine what could be done if every major band put their backing to causes like this?<br />
<br />
I recently chatted on Skype with the primary founder of Echelon House, and I can assure you that there's wonderful plans for the upcoming year: houses for people in flood-ravaged Australia, houses for people still displaced by the Haiti earthquake that killed hundreds of thousands of people last year, houses for people in places where you forget there is suffering.<br />
<br />
As I sit here in this townhouse, it's easy for me to think about how much I hate the carpet or how I'd rather be somewhere else- but when I think about all of the individuals and families who don't have a place to call home, I become overwhelmed with gratitude for the things I have and I feel my desire to help others start to boil over. It makes you think about how lucky you are, and when you feel grateful for who and what you have around you, you treat people a little nicer, laugh more often, and cultivate compassion for the people around you.<br />
<br />
Donating, no matter how small, makes you feel this amazing gratitude and compassion. When I'm having a shitty day (or I want to beat someone's head in with a frying pan because they're a moron) my whole outlook is changed when I donate to something I believe in. Sometimes it's only pocket change. The economy blows and money doesn't go as far as it used to. But $.01 donated by each of us could, literally, change the world. So, the next time you're out and you see a donation jar, put a penny in for me. Regardless of what it's for, that penny is going to help someone who needs it. And the gratitude you feel expands not just with the amount you donate, but with the cause you choose.<br />
<br />
Here's a link to The Echelon House. Each donation makes a difference, no matter how small. <a href="http://echelonhouse.weebly.com/">http://echelonhouse.weebly.com/</a><br />
<br />
<br />
If you're on Twitter, The Echelon House would like you to nominate them for a Shorty award for their cause.<br />
<br />
If you love photography and want to support a good cause, Jared Leto's book of photos from his time spent helping Haiti can be preordered/purchased here, and 100% of net proceeds will be donated to help people in Haiti: <a href="http://30secondstomars.shop.musictoday.com/Dept.aspx?cp=366_41797">http://30secondstomars.shop.musictoday.com/Dept.aspx?cp=366_41797</a><br />
<br />
Thanks for reading, and happy helping!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-14176721470730054242011-01-13T22:42:00.000-08:002011-01-13T22:42:48.202-08:00His Robot Girlfriend by Wesley AllisonThis is another free book I read on my ipod <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Apple-touch-Generation-NEWEST-MODEL/dp/B001FA1O18?ie=UTF8&tag=thelit03-20&link_code=bil&camp=213689&creative=392969" imageanchor="1" target="_blank"><img alt="Apple iPod touch 32 GB (4th Generation) NEWEST MODEL" src="http://ws.amazon.com/widgets/q?MarketPlace=US&ServiceVersion=20070822&ID=AsinImage&WS=1&Format=_SL160_&ASIN=B001FA1O18&tag=thelit03-20" /></a><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=thelit03-20&l=bil&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=B001FA1O18" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /> I'm totally digging this whole 'free books' idea. Or, as my husband puts it: "Don't you EVER put that thing down?!" The only problem with e-books is that you don't get that wonderful book smell. If any of you know where I can get book smell perfume, I will love you for life. Seriously. Ok, enough B.S. Let's do what we came to this shady corner of the internet to accomplish!<div><br />
</div><div>The official book blurb is: "<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Mike Smith's life was crap, living all alone, years after his wife had died and his children had grown up and moved away. Then he saw the commercial for the Daffodil. Far more than other robots, the Daffodil could become anything and everything he wanted it to be. Mike's life is about to change."</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Although that sums things up quite nicely (as book blurbs often do) it doesn't really do story justice. </span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Long story short: Mike Smith's life is crap. He's widowed with two grown children who are out of the house and busy with their own lives, he's a chubby, lazy school teacher with few friends and no real life. This book is set in the relatively near future (which is done very well, I'll get to that in a bit), and Mike decides to get himself a multi-purpose robot companion to help with household chores, companionship, and his sexual needs. He designs and purchases his ideal robot companion, and when she arrives he names her Patience.</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Patience becomes Mike's chef, maid, lover, landscaper, financial analyst, gym partner, friend, and savior. She changes his diet and gets him to work out, she organizes his house and sells his junk on ebay, and she helps him cope with tragic memories he's suppressed deep withing himself. She even risks her 'life' to protect him! She has some very human traits (shoe fetish!) and it is easy to forget that she's not human. So easy, in fact, that Mike develops a genuine love for her. This, of course, is not well-received by a lot of people- and this is also what makes the story pull at me. </span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Once you get past the futuristic robot concept, this story is about one man wanting to marry the person he loves - even though most people strongly disapprove of people marrying robots . This part of the story doesn't show up until the end, but that's because you need to read the stuff before it to become attached to the characters. And the characters are easy to get attached to. </span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">The environment that Wesley Allison creates is so realistic that you can easily visualize the future he writes about. It's quirky, fun, and totally believable. The writing style is easy to read, and I laughed out loud several times throughout the story. I have only one gripe: the predictable and abrupt ending. But, to be honest, I can totally understand it. I just wanted the story to keep going. </span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">I really enjoyed reading this, and I plan on reading more of his stories since I saw there's a bunch of free ones on iBooks. I'm a book whore- it's what I do!</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;"><br />
</span></span></div><div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-60768920615446916422011-01-03T10:32:00.000-08:002011-01-03T16:23:38.626-08:00The Demon Girl by Penelope FletcherSee? I told you I would blog again soon? ;)<br />
<br />
I got an iPod Touch for Christmas, and <u>The Demon Girl</u> is the first book I read on the iBooks application. It was a free book with a pretty cover and an intriguing title, so I decided to give it a try.<br />
<br />
Long story short: Rae Wilder is a Disciple in a world where humans have been nearly wiped out. An event, called the Rupture, caused all kinds of previously repressed beings (known as Demons) to come out into the open. The list of Demons contains all the usual suspects: vampires, were-beasts, and fairies. There's also witches, which are humans who are sensitive to the Source (as in source of life, source of everything- source of power for the beings in this book) who are shunned by normal human folk and are generally considered bad. Humans have walled themselves up in self-contained city/compounds to protect themselves from the Demons who run wild outside.<br />
<br />
One morning. while out for a run, Rae finds finds a way through the wall that protects her and the humans around her from the murderous chaos of the demons outside. Being brave and foolhardy, Rae sneaks outside into the unknown, where her life is changed forever.<br />
<br />
There's a lot to this book, so I'll just say that you will find yourself immersed in the following: love, hate, interspecies romance, blood drinking, human sacrifice, beheadings, fancy powerful jewelry, pretty wings, were-cat things, naked guys, not naked guys, tattoos, tribe wars, and an interesting plot line.<br />
<br />
When I got to the end of the book, I was excited to see that it's going to be a series- I am eagerly anticipating the next installment!<br />
<br />
There were a few bad things about this book- but none of them are story-related. I notice a lot of wrong words (wrong forms of the word to/too, various other mix-ups of homophones) a few misspellings, and some confusing grammar/sentence structure. Once you see past all of that, however, it is a truly engaging read.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-83924879043661466612010-12-24T15:16:00.000-08:002010-12-24T15:16:00.372-08:00Sorry I'm slacking!I've had a lot going on, so I've been slacking on my posts. We have guest from out of town (amazing how many visitors you get when you live in Hawaii!) and I've been preparing for Christmas. I know, I know- excuses, excuses. To make up for it, I'm going to power through a few books. I promise. Just watch me!<br />
<br />
Merry Christmas! May your holidays be bright, your relatives in a tolerable state of intoxication, and the food delicious!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-37908885702322674252010-12-17T10:37:00.000-08:002010-12-17T10:37:17.176-08:00Cards for Matthew Mickelson ButmanHello, friends. This blog post is a little different from the other ones I've posted, but it might be the most important post I've written so far. I want all of you to read this link: <a href="http://gimundo.com/news/article/matthew-mickelson-butman-celebrates-last-christmas-by-sharing-gifts-with-ne/">http://gimundo.com/news/article/matthew-mickelson-butman-celebrates-last-christmas-by-sharing-gifts-with-ne/</a> Did it work? You got it? Well, let me sum it up: Matthew Mickelson Butman is a very thoughtful little boy who is terminally ill. For Christmas, he donated a bunch of stuff to charity and all he wants in return is Christmas cards from around the world. This year for Christmas, I want you to send a card to this little boy. Here's his address again, in case you missed it:<br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">Matthew Mickelson Butman</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"> PO Box 1865 </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">Wylie, TX, 75089.</span><br />
<br />
And while you're at it, find a way to send Christmas cards to soldiers, give gift cards to the homeless, and spread a little cheer. We're all just people, after all- and people need to feel loved. Never underestimate the power of kindness from strangers.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-75349511380312775742010-11-24T13:07:00.000-08:002010-11-24T13:21:19.321-08:00The Hound of the Baskervilles<u>The Hound of the Baskervilles</u> is a Sherlock Holmes novel written by Sir Aurthur Conan Doyle. It is also the only Sherlock Holmes novel I have ever read, but it certainly won't be the last. I found the story to be very entertaining, and I didn't feel too lost in spite of the many unfamiliar words and settings- most of it was easily understood through context clues. This might not be important to some readers, but it means a lot to me. I like to be able to develop a feel for the surroundings of the characters to get into the mood of the book. This can be difficult to do when you have no idea what the heck is going on... For example, I've never been to England. I've never been on the moors, or been in a mire. I have no real idea of what London is like, let alone what it was like over 100 years ago. I'm a housewife who is pushing 30 and lives in Hawaii and who doesn't get out much. Yet, somehow, though Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's writing I was still able to step into the shoes of Dr. Watson so fully that I was able to feel the chill air of the English moors- without turning on the air conditioner!<br />
<br />
Long story short:<br />
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are an ambiguously gay (you read it your way, I'll read it mine!) pair of detectives living in London. Sherlock Holmes is well known for his master sleuthing skills and generally fashionable appearance, Dr. Watson is well known as being the constant companion and personal assistant and roommate and business partner and lesser skilled detective counterpart of Sherlock Holmes.<br />
<br />
One evening, Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were sitting in their home in London being ambiguously gay and studying a walking stick that had been left in their office. Sherlock Holmes asks Watson what he thinks about it, then makes Watson feel stupid for missing some details. (I like to think Watson then ran off flailing his arms and sobbing loudly like Nathan Lane's character in The Birdcage).<br />
<br />
Before long the owner of the walking stick, James Mortimer, shows up and and tells Holmes and Watson of the legend of the curse of the Baskerville family. Basically, one guy was an evil psycho and sold his soul to the devil. He kidnapped a girl, she escaped, and when he chased after her a giant black hound from Hell killed him. The legend goes that the hound kills off the Baskervilles one by one after they inherit the estate.<br />
<br />
Everyone thinks it's a giant load of bullshit until Mortimer explains that a good friend of his, Charles Baskerville, was found dead from an apparent heart attack and looked as though he had been scared to death.<br />
<br />
Holmes and Watson agree to meet the next Baskerville heir, a man named Henry. Upon meeting Henry, they discover that one of his boots has been stolen. Henry also receives an anonymous note warning him to stay away from the moor. Holmes makes some deductions about the note, and agrees to take the case.<br />
<br />
Later they all meet at Holmes' and Watson's apartment to discuss some details. As Mortimer and Henry are leaving, Holmes and Watson follow them only to find that Mortimer and Henry are being followed. Holmes and Watson follow the follower, and notice he seems to be wearing a fake beard. They do some sleuthing but are unable to find out who the guy is.<br />
<br />
Henry decides he's going to Baskerville estate anyway, Watson is designated to join him while Holmes finishes a case in London. A string of suspicious characters come in and out of the story, some weirdness happens, and Holmes solves the case. And that's all I'm gonna tell you because you should read the book yourself- it's very good!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
And now for my moment of thankfulness: I am thankful for the improvement of my friend Lara's condition. She's having to learn how to use her body all over again, but she's a strong woman and I just know she's going to get through this!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-67707354140471725732010-11-10T08:57:00.000-08:002010-11-15T13:53:44.888-08:00The Wonderful Wizard of OzUntil I read <u>The Wonderful Wizard of Oz</u> I pretty much thought the version starring the adorable Judy Garland was how the story went. Boy was I wrong! Being the towering pillar of immaturity I am, I tend to really get into children's books and even some teen books. This was no exception. Wonderfully written, this story rich and vibrant enough to keep you enthralled while still being light and airy enough that you don't fill like your brain is getting heavy- like a good chocolate mousse. Since I do most of my reading before bed, it is easy for me to get caught up in a book and stay up after reading it while my brain runs in circles and tried to dissect the story/plot/information that it was just fed. <u>The Wonderful Wizard of Oz</u> didn't have that effect on me. Instead it gave me the simple joy of being a part of the the land of Oz, and the whole time I read the story I felt like a kids again. Something in the experience made me feel like I was wrapped in a fuzzy blanket drinking hot cocoa by a fireplace- warm, comfortable, relaxed.<br />
<br />
Long story short:<br />
Most of us know the basic story- Little girl (Dorothy) from Kansas lives with her aunt and uncle, and when a cyclone hits she doesn't make it into the cellar and is swept up into the storm, house and all, with her little dog Toto. House lands on a witch in a weird place called Oz, Dorothy gets some shiny new shoes, and sets out to find a wizard who can help her get home, with the people of Oz bidding her good luck and best wishes because they're thrilled that the witch got squished. Dorothy is told that she can follow the yellow brick road to the Emerald City where the Wizard of Oz lives, and along her journey she befriends a living scarecrow who wants a brain, a rusted tin man who wants a heart, and a cowardly lion who wants some courage. They face some perils, meet the wizard (who send them off to have an altercation with the Wicked Witch of the West), kill the other witch, come back to the wizard (who turns out to be a man from the Midwestern US) and he gives Dorothy's friends some random crap that's supposed to represent the things they were looking for. Meanwhile, he promises Dorothy that he will take her home in a hot air balloon because it is the only way to cross the desert that surrounds Oz. Hot air balloon is made, but it takes off by accident without Dorothy. Dorothy gets upset, meets with a good witch, and the good witch tells her that the shiny shoes are magic and can bring her home. Dorothy uses the shoes, everyone lives happily ever after.<br />
<br />
However... the book is a lot different from the movie I knew and loved as a child. Here's how the book and movie differ:<br />
<br />
In the book, the shoes are silver, not ruby<br />
<br />
The perils that Dorothy and her friends encounter on their journey are geographical and have nothing to do with the Wicked Witch of the West- the witch has a MUCH larger part in the movie than in the book<br />
<br />
Dorothy is sent to kill the Witch of the West, not just collect her broom<br />
<br />
There are whole races of people encountered in the book that do not get mentioned in the movie<br />
<br />
Dorothy doesn't meet the Witch of the West until she is sent to go kill her<br />
<br />
The book goes into much more detail about the Wizard in general- describing his city, how he got there, and how and why he deceived the people of Oz<br />
<br />
When Dorothy first lands in Oz, the meets the witch of the North- Glinda is the witch of the South<br />
<br />
When Dorothy arrives home, she wasn't dreaming- she was actually gone.<br />
<br />
There's a lot of other little differences, and a lot of things that are left out of the movie altogether. All-in-all, this was a very enjoyable read, and I plan on reading it to my children.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
To keep with the theme of gratitude this month, here's some things I'm grateful for: My health, and the health of my family. A friend of mine recently had a major aneurysm and could have very easily died. She's in the hospital recovering, going through physical therapy, and her chances of living and recovering are good.<br />
<br />
I'm also grateful for my little girls. They drive me crazy, but I couldn't live without them. My youngest walked for the first time yesterday, and it was very bittersweet because she is my last baby. I need to make it a point to not get caught up in the things I want to get done each day so I don't forget to play with my girls. REALLY play with them. Dads shouldn't get to have all the fun!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-90831181331647845802010-11-05T11:39:00.000-07:002010-11-05T11:53:29.162-07:00The Rights of Man<u>The Rights of Man</u> was written by Thomas Paine in 1791 as a retort to Edmund Burke's criticism of the French Revolution. <u>The Rights of Man</u> not only defends the French Revolution, but states that revolution is necessary when a government fails its people. This, as you can imagine, was not well received by many governments at the time.<br />
<br />
Long story short:<br />
The bad thing about <u>The Rights of Man</u> is that it's kind of a bore to read after a bit. Mostly because it's repetitive. Other than that, it made me feel empowered- motivated to make a difference where I can. It is an inspiring call to arms that still rings true after all of this time. A lot of what is written feels like common sense- common sense that you never really thought about before. For example, people have rights. Pretty basic. However, when a government 'grants' you rights (gay marriage, anyone?) they are implying that somehow they have the power to give and take the things that should be considered basic freedoms in any truly civilized society. <br />
<br />
Everyone has the right to be happy as long as they aren't hurting or oppressing other people, right? The government's job should be to protect that freedom, right? Then why are we letting them tell us what freedoms we can and cannot have? Is your government allowing you to have the freedoms you have a right to simply by being alive? Is it telling you which basic rights you can and cannot have? Are they a protective, uniting force or are they an oppressive, dividing force? These are the questions that <u>The Rights of Man</u> encourages you to consider.<br />
<br />
This isn't the most entertaining thing I've ever read- however, it is one of the most inspiring. I think that everyone should have to read it as an adult, when you're old enough to appreciate it and consider the message behind it.<br />
<br />
<br />
To steal and idea from a blogger friend of mine, I'm going to end this post with something I'm grateful for: I'm grateful that I live in a country where I can help choose who runs it and I'm allowed to think that they are all dipshits. I would have long ago been beheaded or punished in other countries. Thank you, United States of America! You are not perfect, but you are mine. And I'm grateful for that.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-74213746533853130622010-10-28T20:59:00.000-07:002010-10-28T20:59:23.695-07:00The Vegetarian GrillNow, before you call shenanigans on me for posting this before I finish reading <u>Rights of Man</u>, allow me to promise you that I have indeed been reading it. However, I've also been on a quest to whip my family's dietary habits into shape. Although I'm not going to make them go strictly vegetarian, I am trying to incorporate more vegetarian meals into our menu. Also... I'm scared of grilling. And I want to overcome that fear. So, yes, I am reviewing a cookbook.<br />
<br />
It's a cookbook. So, it has recipes. I haven't tried any of them yet, because I'm still scared of the grill. But that's not important. Let's change the subject. In the cookbook, there are little random blocks of info- hints, tips, anecdotes- that sort of crap. This is common and totally unremarkable except for one little line I found: "My kids and I especially enjoy grilled marinated tofu, right out of the refrigerator."<br />
<br />
....And this is where I call BULLSHIT!!!!! I've never met a kid who has enjoyed tofu- not grilled, not marinated, not anything! You could dip it in peanut butter, cover it in chocolate, and smother it with caramel and your average kid would still gag as soon as that shit hit their throat. Furthermore, I've never known an adult who has said "you know, I really enjoyed tofu as a child." Sorry, Ms. Andrea Chesman- I'm not buying it! Whatever crap that poor woman is feeding her children must me abominable in order for them to "enjoy" tofu. Unless, of course, by "kids" she is being literal and referring to young goats. Then I might owe her an apology, because goats will eat anything.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-90183895110078442752010-10-17T21:41:00.000-07:002010-10-19T23:46:16.073-07:00...And Now For Something Completely Different!I've focused solely on the literary aspect of of this blog thus far, but the name also clearly implies that I am a housewife. And so, to fill the vast open spaces between books, I'm going to start adding some housewifely material to this blog. Mostly because of how long it took me to read <u>Don Quixote</u>, partly because I just started reading <u>Rights of Man</u>, which, from the looks of things, will also take a while to finish.<br />
<br />
My first housewifely tip is... FAKE IRONING! I hate ironing clothes. I hate it like I hate stepping on a slug barefoot. That being said, my friend Toni taught me this little trick. Get a spray bottle, and fill it half full of water. Fill the the remaining empty space with any white colored fabric softener. Spray on dry clothes until slightly damp, then shake, stretch, and smooth the wrinkles away, and hang them up. Good to go! Why white fabric softener? Because the colored stuff will leave spots on your clothes. This is cheaper than buying the anti-wrinkle spray, and less hot and more lazy than ironing. FYI- does not remove wrinkles from face, no matter how much you shake yourself. Oh well, at least I tried!<br />
<br />
Also, even though I started this blog with the intent of only reading the classic books I have immediately available to me, people like to give me books as gifts- so there will also be some more modern books coming soon at random intervals.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-6724307750881174822010-10-04T17:21:00.000-07:002010-10-04T17:21:40.739-07:00Don Quixote of La ManchaThis book took me a long time to finish. It definitely has its awesome moments, and I can see how it came to be considered a classic- however, it also has many long boring stretches and is hard to follow at times. The parts that are good are very, very good- and the parts that aren't... well, I've fallen asleep while reading it on more than one occasion.<br />
<br />
Long story short: Alonso Quixano is a retired man of fifty with too much time on his hands and an unhealthy obsession with books about knights and chivalrous adventures. One day he decides to become a knight, because he is bat-shit insane and has way too much free time. He renames himself Don Quixote, decides that a lady in town is his lady-love (unbeknownst to her) and changes her name to Dulcinea (which she is also totally clueless about) and sets off on his old beat up work horse to commit acts of chivalry in her name (again, with her having no idea that this is going on).<br />
He sets out on a mission to be knighted. He goes to an inn, which he believes is a castle, and has the innkeeper knight him. After leaving the inn, he has a negative encounter with some people who refuse to acknowledge Dulcinea's beauty. He is very severely beaten. He gets found and rescued by a neighbor who brings him home.<br />
Don Quixote's niece, housekeeper, priest, and barber try to talk him out of continuing his adventures. He doesn't listen to their advice, so while he is still recovering they wall up his library and destroy his books. When he tries to find them, they convince him that the whole library was taken by an enchanter. He, being totally bonkers, believes it completely.<br />
Despite the advice of his friends and family, Don Quixote resumes his misadventures. He promises a dull-witted neighbor, Sancho Panza, that he will give him an island to govern if he will be his squire. Sancho agrees, believing a knight as fine as Don Quixote will surely earn a fine island. Sancho eventually catches on that Don Quixote is crazy, but they have many interesting misadventures including:<br />
<br />
Don Quixote battles windmills, believing that they are giants<br />
<br />
The making of a wondrous remedy which is supposed to heal, and instead causes the Don to vomit and pass out and nearly kills Sancho<br />
<br />
Leaving an inn without paying, only to have Sancho get tormented and their wallets get stolen<br />
<br />
The loss of some teeth<br />
<br />
The murdering of some sheep<br />
<br />
The stealing of a barber's basin, believing it to be a helmet<br />
<br />
Various beatings, bouts of diarrhea, and assorted uncomfortable bodily afflictions<br />
<br />
Being captured and hauled home in a cage<br />
<br />
The attacking of various innocent people, animals, and inanimate objects<br />
<br />
and a whole lot of trickery at Don Quixote's expense.<br />
<br />
Definitely worth reading, though at times the reading is very slow. I particularly love the battling with the windmills- for some reason that scene really strikes a chord with me. Much of what we see as a giant or obstacle may in reality be a tool to help us in some way. So when armed for battle, be sure to ask yourself: is this truly a giant? Or just a windmill? Is this even my windmill to battle?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-66103039657628650992010-09-10T01:11:00.000-07:002010-09-10T01:11:22.842-07:00The Secret GardenOk. Aside from being a smartass, I'm also a total sap. Most movies with ANY emotional content, no matter how cheesy, will make me sob. Especially if it has anything to do with a parent and their child. <u>The Secret Garden</u> is no exception. It is well written, easy to read, and has engaging characters. I've probably read the story or watched the movie at some point in my youth, but if I did I don't remember it.<br />
<br />
Long story short:<br />
Mary is an plain, sickly, ugly little child with a horrid personality. She lives in India with her rich family who wants nothing to do with her. In fact, she barely even sees her parents because they assigned an ayah to take care of her. Mary's ayah doesn't like her- but she does her every bidding. Mary doesn't even dress herself! She is spoiled while still being unloved, therefore unloving, thus making her incredibly unpleasant.<br />
<br />
A nasty case of cholera comes through and kills Mary's parents and her ayah. The rest of the servants all flee, forgetting about Mary because she's an obnoxious little shit and no one likes her. She is found by some people and sent to live with her uncle Archibald Craven in England.<br />
<br />
Upon arriving in England, she finds out her uncle also wants nothing to do with her and he's usually gone all of the time. A chambermaid, Martha, befriends Mary and helps her learn to dress herself and take care of herself a bit. One day, Martha tells Mary about a secret garden that is all locked up since Mrs. Craven died, because it was her favorite place. Mary, being bored and curious and lonely decides that she is going to find the garden.<br />
<br />
During her searching, she befriends a grumpy old gardener who tells her more about the garden. She also befriends a robin, who flies around and does bird stuff. As Mary explores the grounds and develops an interest in her surroundings, she becomes more tolerable and healthier. One day, Mary finds the key. Shortly thereafter, the robin shows her the way to the door, and Mary makes her way into the secret garden. The garden is gray and appears lifeless, so Mary decides she's going to bring it back to life. She enlists the help of Martha's brother, Dickon, to restore the garden.<br />
<br />
Meanwhile.... some nights, Mary hears crying and doesn't know where its coming from. She wanders the halls trying to find it, but no one will fess up and tell her what the fuck is going on. Since she's kind of a nosy brat she takes it upon herself to figure out what's up.<br />
<br />
She follows the sound of the incessant sobbing to a hidden door, and lets herself in. Inside, she finds a child even more sickly and obnoxious than herself. His name is Colin, he's a terrible hypochondriac and is convinced he's gonna die. He doesn't go outside, he doesn't walk, and he doesn't like people to look at him. He's also got some major daddy issues because good ol' Uncle Archie can't stand the sight of him because 1) he looks like his dead mom 2) Archibald Craven is mildly hunchbacked and he's afraid his son will be the same way and 3) Mr. Craven is gone pretty much all the time.<br />
<br />
Stubborn Mary and spoiled Colin become friends while Mary's other friendship with Dickon (who is pretty much perfect) also grows while they work on the garden, which is kept secret from the adults. Soon, Colin grows jealous of Dickon and wants in on the garden scene. So Colin meets Dickon, and the kids arrange to have Colin brought outside, where Dickon will push him in his wheelchair.<br />
<br />
Colin falls in love with the garden, and wants to go every day. He soon gets over his hypochondria and realizes his back and legs are perfectly fine, and he begins to walk and exercise in the garden. His activities are kept secret from the adults because he wants to surprise his father and win his affections by proving that he is perfectly healthy.<br />
<br />
So, blah blah blah, flowers bloom, kids exercise, adults are confused by Colin's health and behavior seeming to get better. He throws fake tantrums and tries to be as bad as before, but his increasing health and happiness become too much to hide.<br />
<br />
Mr. Craven, while abroad, begins randomly thinking about what a shoddy father he's been and decides he wants to do better when he gets home. One night he has a dream about his wife being in her garden, and it sticks with him.<br />
<br />
When he gets home he asks his housekeeper about Colin, and she tells him he seems a lot better but has been acting strangely. He asks where he is, and she says he out in the gardens. He walks out to the gardens and hears laughter coming from the garden that was supposed to be locked up. As he walks to the door of the garden, Colin runs out after winning a race against Mary and runs right into his father. Archibald sees his son perfectly healthy and happy, Colin sees that his father is happy to see him and loves him, and the sap reading the book cries her eyes out while father and son walk back to the house. The end.<br />
<br />
Great book- this blog absolutely does not do it justice!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-8984603838009437612010-09-07T09:33:00.000-07:002010-09-07T09:33:15.045-07:00King Lear<i>"King Lear"</i> is considered to be one of Shakespeare's greatest works of all time. OF ALL TIME! That's a pretty big order to fill! I love gut-wrenching, convoluted, indecipherable tragedies just as much as the next gal- Romeo and Juliet has been a favorite of mine long before Leo DiCaprio and Claire Danes totally nailed the modernized version on the big screen. That being said, it took me a long time to trudge through it (who doesn't love trying to understand Shakespearian prose, amiright?) and there were definitely a few words I didn't understand, but the story still managed to shine through in all of it's depressing glory.<br />
<br />
Long story short:<br />
King Lear is a self-important aging ruler who is generally viewed as being eccentric. He asks his three daughters to describe how much they love him, and the one who does it best will get the largest piece of his kingdom. He totally expects his youngest and most favorite daughter, Cordelia, to give the best answer. His other daughters, Regan and Goneril, also expect Cordelia to win- but since they're self-serving wenches of the most conniving and competitive sort, they are masters at the art of ass kissery (if Shakespeare can invent words, so can I!).<br />
<br />
Regan and Goneril perform their ass kissery with grace and false affection and impress their father as expected. When it comes to be Cordelia's turn, she bucks the trend by keeping it short and sweet, and says that she can't put her love for her father into words. This infuriates the vain crazy king, so he disinherits her and calls her a disgrace. The king of France, who has been making eyes at Cordelia for a while, says he will marry her even without her land- so she takes him up on the offer and moves to France without her father's blessing (and presumably eats a lot of tasty baked goods, because that is totally what I would do).<br />
<br />
Before long, the true colors of Lear's eldest daughters shine through and their general mistreatment slowly drives him even more completely batshit insane, so that he's nuttier than a squirrel turd- which prompts him to run off and be crazy on the heath (big open area dominated by low growing woody vegetation- thanks Wikipedia!) during some nasty stormy weather.<br />
<br />
While this is going on some nobleman, Gloucester, (who is loyal to Lear) has to deal with his illegitimate son causing trouble. The illegitimate son, Edmund, is a total douche. He probably wears a lot of Ed Hardy and watches The Jersey Shore and thinks it's gospel. Aside from two-timing Regan and the married Goneril, he also convinces Gloucester that his legitimate son, Edgar, is out to kill him- thus causing a manhunt for Edgar. It's pretty much an episode of Jerry Springer from the middle ages.<br />
<br />
Then some more bad stuff happens and pretty much everyone dies. Edgar kills Edmund, Goneril poisons Regan out of jealousy over Edmund, then poisons herself. Gloucester dies after spending most of the story blind after having his eyeballs forcibly removed. Cordelia dies after being needlessly executed in prison, and Lear dies from grief after losing Cordelia.<br />
<br />
The end.<br />
<br />
Kinda makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, doesn't it? No? Me either!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-86912153914211068052010-08-19T15:57:00.001-07:002010-09-07T09:34:04.979-07:00The Scarlet LetterFirstly- sorry it took me so long! Life got in the way, and by 'life' I mean having two crazy kids under 3 and deciding to travel nearly 3,000 miles from home. But enough about me.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div>I never read <i>The Scarlet Letter</i> when I was in school, so I've heard about it, but had only the most vague idea of what it was about. Now that I've read it in its entirety I understand why it is a classic. It's beautifully written, has great character development, and a storyline which manages to stay relevant and relatable.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Long book short: Young and beautiful Hester Prynne arrives at a Puritan establishment in New England before her old and deformed husband gets there. A year passes, and nobody hears from Mr. Prynne. Hot young Hester hooks up with a hot young preacher (Aurthur Dimmesdale) and BAM! Hester gets knocked up with their hot young baby. Hester doesn't want to ruin the hot young preacher's reputation of being the best thing since Jesus, so she refuses to tell anyone who the father of her illicit love child is. Pregnancy goes on, baby is born (it's a girl!), and SURPRISE! Hester's creepy husband shows up after two years of not telling her anything only to see that she's had someone's baby. Luckily for him, no one has any idea who he is- so he tells Hester that since she ruined his life (*cough* total asshole! *cough*) she totally owes it to him to act like she doesn't know him so he can live his life as a doctor without his reputation being sullied by his whore wife. Oh, and he wants to know who baby's daddy is so he can destroy him. Hester refuses to tell him what he wants to know, so he vows to find out for himself and make the man's life a living Hell. The people of the town want Hester to be punished in various ways, but the young minister who shares Hester's secret calms them and votes for a milder sentence- a bright scarlet A (for 'adulteress') is to be worn on her breast at all times. So Hester stands on a platform and gets the letter pinned to her chest in front of the whole town. Hester and her baby girl, named Pearl, then go live out in the woods on the outskirts of town as outcasts. </div><div><br />
</div><div>Hester decorates her letter A using her amazing embroidery skills, her ex husband assumes the name of Roger Chillingworth and becomes a town doctor, and the virile young preacher begins getting more and more ill. Good old Roger Chillingworth figures out that the attractive preacher is Pearl's father, and becomes his personal physician so he can torment him without the preacher knowing that Roger is actually Hester's estranged husband. </div><div><br />
</div><div>Pearl becomes a precocious, intelligent child who doesn't fit in with her peers. She's beautiful and wild, and Hester makes beautiful clothes for her while keeping herself very plain.</div><div><br />
</div><div>The townsfolk at one point were going to try to take Pearl away from Hester because they didn't feel that Pearl was being brainwashed enough in accordance with Puritan doctrine, but sexy (kinda half dead looking by this point) preacher Dimmesdale steps in and changes their minds. Everyone assumes it is because he is pious and in touch with God- no one suspects that it is because he is actually Pearl's father.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Hester's embroidery skills make her an asset to the community, and since she remains sin-free aside from having a baby out of wedlock, she slowly regains some degree of respect from the townsfolk.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Some well-loved old guy dies late at night and a few key characters are milling about doing whatever it is that their specific character does. Aurthur is beating himself up psychologically for having loved Hester, for hiding the truth from the townspeople, and for being a big fat hypocrite because he's supposed to be all godly and stuff. Hester and Pearl walk by and see him, and we have a touching scene on the scaffold where Hester received her letter.</div><div><br />
</div><div>By this time, Roger Chillingworth is living with Aurthur Dimmesdale to 'take care of him' while he's ailing. But seriously... "Roger Chillingworth." How could they NOT know he was a bad guy? Anyway, Hester is pretty sick of his bullshit, so she decides that she's going to tell Dimmesdale what's going on...</div><div><br />
</div><div>Preacher Arthur Dimmesdale's health continues to deteriorate and he soon looks like the walking dead. He goes for a stroll in the woods, where he runs into Hester. Hester fesses up that Chillingworth is actually her estranged husband who wants to make him miserable until he's dead. </div><div><br />
</div><div>They talk and realize that they are still in love, and Pearl (now 7) figures out who her daddy is, but is angry that he won't publicly acknowledge them. Hester and Arthur talk of hopping on the next boat out of there and living happily ever after. They make plans to bail, and they begin trying up their personal affairs (ha ha- get it?) so they can sail off into the sunset.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Arthur has a big fancy sermon he's supposed to give for an election festival the day before he and Hester hop on a boat and sail away. So he finishes writing his speech, confident that it is his best sermon ever.</div><div><br />
</div><div>The day of the sermon arrives, and everyone gathers to hear it. Dimmesdale appears to have some of his old spark back, in spite of looking like he's going to keel over at any moment. He gives his sermon, and while he is speaking Hester learns that her good friend Chillingworth has booked himself on the same boat that she and Dimmesdale were using to make their escape. The sermon wraps up, the band marches on, and Dimmesdale spots Hester and Pearl near the scaffold where she was punished. Dimmesdale is so sick and emaciated that he can barely walk, but he stumbles over to Hester and asks her to help him climb the scaffold. They make it to the top, where he announces to everyone there that Pearl is his daughter. Pearl kisses him, and then he keels over dead. Chillingworth is devastated that he never got to complete his tormenting of Aurthur in the way he wanted because he's a stupid asshole who needs to get over shit.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Chillingworth dies a year later, and leaves a nice chunk of money to Pearl. Hester and Pearl leave, and many years later Hester comes back to live in her little cottage in the woods alone.</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>This is a seriously good book, and rightfully considered a literary classic. It is definitely a book of substance, I don't recommend if you're just looking for a brainless-yet-entertaining read. It should be read when you have time to chew it over and absorb its depth. </div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-21255276659448504572010-08-07T21:39:00.000-07:002010-08-07T22:26:21.853-07:00EmmaThe first book I finished since starting this blog is the Jane Austen classic, <i>Emma</i>. True to much of the fine English literature written at the time, <i>Emma</i> features a lot of irrelevant material about nothing in particular- thus adding length without substance. Most of the characters are engaging, and the storyline itself is quite good, but it's kind of a drag to read. <div><br /></div><div>Jane Austen herself once commented that she didn't think many people would like the title character. I can only assume that this is because Emma is a spoiled, self-important twit who thinks she knows everything... If you took the vapid, self-absorbed hotness of your least favorite high school cheerleader/model/actress, multiplied it by the know-it-all behavior of Hermione Granger from Harry Potter (minus the magic and scholarly pursuits) and divided THAT by the matchmaking prowess of Patti from T.V's <i>Millionaire Matchmaker</i>, you would have the character of Emma. </div><div><br /></div><div>To make a really long story short: Emma is a meddling twit who credits herself for her sister getting married. This inspires her to try to set up a girl she befriends, Harriet, with a guy who is totally out of her league (Mr. Elton) while discouraging Harriet from marrying the guy who is in love with her and is totally perfect for her- all because he doesn't have enough money for Emma to think he's important. A good family friend who is also Emma's brother-in-law tries to tell Emma that her notions are totally whack, but she's too much of a dumb bitch to believe him. Mr. Elton turns out to be a total dick who wants to marry Emma for her money, thus Harriet's stupid little heart (nice girl, but kind of a moron) gets broken. Mr. Elton instead marries an even bigger twit than Emma, and everyone with half an ounce of sense wants to punch her face in; but no one does because it's England and they all have exceptional manners and sexy accents. A whole bunch of people who have no bearing on the body of the story weave in and out of the picture doing random B.S. and it turns out that two of them were secretly engaged the whole time (oh, snap!) and it creates a scandal and a lot of embarrassment because everyone has too good of manners and too much free time. Harriet decides she has the hots for Emma's brother-in-law because he was nice to her, and that makes Emma realize that she's totally in love with him. Turns out he's been in love with her since she was 13 (eeeeew, CREEEEPY!!!!) and poor Harriet gets screwed over again. Then the guy who wasn't 'good enough' for Harriet comes back into the picture, and she decides that she loves him no matter what Emma thinks- which is super convenient because Emma eventually realizes that she is a spoiled, self-important twit and has a major change of heart. Everyone gets married and lives happily ever after, and by the end of the book you no longer want to beat Emma's head in.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1858710959395128459.post-31444993185947187912010-07-29T09:33:00.000-07:002010-07-29T09:44:45.424-07:00The Sweet Smell of BooksHello, internets! My name is Jess, I'm pushing 30, and I'm a bit of a book whore. I have two young daughters (both under the age of 3 at the time of this post), a wonderful husband (who, being thoroughly male, often drives me bonkers- but I truly love him), two cats, and a stupid little dog named Rocky. We live in Hawaii on the island of Oahu. Nice to meet you!<div><br /></div><div>I recently purchased '100 Classic Books' for my DSi portable game system, and I've decided to read them all and write my interpretation of them here. I read books fairly quickly, so it shouldn't take more than a couple days between posts. Once I've finished reading these 100 classics, I intend to read some more modern novels, possible chosen by any followers who wander onto this blog.</div><div><br /></div><div>Thanks for checking me out, and happy reading!</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17182172661544456390noreply@blogger.com1